The Trials We Face

A couple of days ago, a really good friend told me something that really shook me up. I am honored that my friend came to me and told me something they have been struggling with and I believe our friendship will be better than ever now, but what they told me has caused a stir in my heart and my emotions. At first I was okay with what they told me, but as the shock wore off, I felt hurt, betrayed, and disgusted. It was like my wounds were tore open again and the hurt I have had stored deep down inside resurfaced again.

I have known this person for a long time, but I have always thought there was something going on in my friends heart and spirit. I have taken a few guesses as to what it could be, but when asked, my friend always denied it. For years, I have always put it to God knowing that he would take care of it and when and if the time came for my friend to come to me and share their story, I would be there to listen and help this person get through their struggle.

I am thankful that the time finally came. I know what it is like to keep a deep dark secrete and it can really make an impact on you physically, emotionally and spiritually. I am glad that I can help my friend try to overcome their struggle. I admit it has been hard because I am dealing with my own hurt and I don’t really have anyone to talk to about this, so I have to process my feelings on my own. I have asked for prayer and of course I have prayed myself and that is helping. I have known this person forever and I have admired my friend and love them, but I’ve also had a slight hatred because of this person’s actions and the hurt they have caused me in the past. I now feel that all of the hurt that I’ve had stored in my heart can finally be healed because the truth has come out and my friend has finally been honest with me.

I know that it will take time to restore our friendship and to fully trust again, but the hard part is over and now it is the time for a fresh start with our friendship. Even though I am going through my own struggles, God must think I am the right person to help my friend though this. So I am taking this task seriously. I am excited about this and I can’t wait to see what lies ahead in our friendship. I just hope that this person continues to be open and honest with me. I think that is my only fear with this whole situation. They have already taken accountability, but will they always be accountable and share with me when and if they fail?

A verse that has really helped me this week is “We know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to his purpose” Romans 8:28. His purpose for our trials is often times to bring us towards him and to surrender to him. Not only is he reshaping my friend, he is also reshaping me to be better in all areas of my life.

I know all of us face trials in our lives. We all hate trials, but even though we all wish we never had them, I know that I wouldn’t be strong in my faith. I know that I wouldn’t be a strong woman and I know that I wouldn’t be in the position to help my friend go through something challenging. So as weird as this sounds, I am glad to be a part of this challenging time in my friends life and my life. God will reshape both of us to be better than we ever were.

It's Like it Never Happened...

Today’s the day. This morning a big lime green ServePro truck pulled up to our house. In that truck had our things that make our home a home. In other words, we got our stuff back from the restoration company. Before they arrived, we got a list of things that were non-restorable. It was a 556 page document. Most things that couldn’t be restored were food, toiletries, diapers, and other things that can be easily replaced. There were a few things that were destroyed that had meaning, but for the most part, it is just stuff.

I have been struggling though. Lots of anxiety. I can’t really figure out why though. A couple of weeks ago, we drove by our house. When I saw it, I instantly got sick to my stomach. This morning as they were unloading I felt sick with anxiety. The fire must have really impacted me more than I thought. I can’t imagine what it would be like if we had lost everything and the house burned to the ground. I have always had compassion for those who have been in a house fire, but now I am really compassionate and my heart really goes out to people who have been impacted by fire.  

John and I have been able to help with the Fort Worth Professional Firefighters Charities organization. They helped us out and in return, we are helping them by trying to promote their charity. We were interviewed a couple of weeks ago and we are trying to help them with strengthening their charity as well and give them helpful tips on how to serve people in crisis better. I hope that we can continue to help people who are in need and I hope that this charity can become a bigger and better charity because there is definitely a need.

I am thankful for the ServePro people. They are so nice and seem caring. They have been unpacking and putting stuff away all day. I feel weird just sitting back and watching them unpack our stuff, but I guess that is what they are paid to do. Their slogan is “it’s like it never happened,” and it’s true. A lot of our stuff looks brand new and not damaged at all.

Now the next step is going through all of the non-restorable things and putting a price to them. Then hopefully we can get a settlement to replace the things that were lost, like our couches, mattresses, etc. I really can’t wait to sleep on a real bed. After this, I don’t think I want to sleep on an air mattress ever again.

I am really looking forward to this chapter coming to a close. It has been the easiest crisis we have gone through, but it definitely hasn’t been easy. I am looking forward to some normalcy and feel like we can make memories in our new home again.