I obviously didn't take care of myself during this time of my life and I was also miserable too. I struggled at life and was unhappy...and exhausted. There were even a few times I landed in the emergency room because of fatigue and stress. I have learned that I hold my stress on the right side of my torso. I often mistake the pain as a kidney or bladder infection, gallstones or a appendicitis. These are expensive mistakes and its no fun having pain due to stress.
Since I have been married, I have gained 50 pounds.I can't even wear my wedding ring anymore. Going clothes shopping isn't fun either, because nothing fits. When I sit back and think about the last 8 years, I can't believe how I let myself go. Especially when I was an advocate for excercising and being healthy.
For 2013, my goal was to get moving again. I started out going to the gym before work. I was pretty successful getting up super early in the morning and working out, but I got bored and I didn't have anything to hold me accountable. I needed something more intense, like Crossfit or something. In May, John encouraged me to do taekwondo with him. He told me I would get a good workout. So of course, I tried it and have been doing it since May 13th (our wedding anniversary). I do get a great workout every time and I have noticed results. So I feel like I can say I was successful with meeting my goal for 2013!!
Although I have rocked the goal of exercise, I still struggle in other areas of my life. This year I have been struggling with a lot of anxiety attacks. I also feel like I am drowning in the ocean of life. This last year has been super stressful for me. I started a new job, which at first I liked, but learned real quick (within a month of employment), the company and job was not for me. I do not have a healthy work environment and my morals and values are higher than the mission of those I work for. I have been actively job searching, but obviously God is not done with me yet.
Graduate school was another thing that stressed me out. Before moving to Texas, I was pretty much finished with grad school, except for the last requirement, which was the thesis project. For the last year, I struggled to stay motivated and complete a project that was super challenging. Thankfully, I finished grad school last week and now I can finally get rid of something that was one of the hardest things I've ever done. But I am proud I accomplished something so big, and I am the first one in my family to get a master's degree.
My goal for 2014 is to get back on track with eating. A few years ago I found out that I had a food allergy to dairy and I am not supposed to have sugar. Since I found out about my food allergies, I have learned a lot about how dairy isn't really good for anyone and also what food can do to your body if you are allergic to food. It is hard to give up dairy. It is practically in everything. But the more I eat it, the worse it makes me feel and look. Sugar also makes me feel sick as well. So if I want to loose weight and feel great, I need to ditch the dairy and sugar. I also want to decrease gluten as well. I do not eat a lot of gluten to begin with, but when I have food with gluten in it, it makes me feel yucky too. So I guess clean eating and eating healthy foods is the way to go. This is not a diet, its a life style. A lifestyle that will take some time to get used to, but it is important for me so I do not continue to feel sick.
Another goal for 2014 is to be more substainable. This sounds really Oregon of me, but I want to recycle more and use less waste. Texas isn't as big on recycling like the West Coast is, so I have slacked a little on recycling because its more of a challenge here. I also want my home to be less toxic. So using more natural cleaners would be ideal, as well at ditching my old candles and getting candles with soy or beeswax wics since they burn cleaner. I also want to make a compost so I can plant healthy herbs and plants.
So that is basically it. I am excited to see what 2014 brings and how my life will change next year. I wish you luck on your New Years resolutions!