Pregnancy: My First Trimester

I have something that Six Flags doesn't have... the pregnancy hormone roller coaster. It is probably one of the scariest roller coasters of all time, haha. Tomorrow I will be 12 weeks pregnant. What a journey it has been so far. I had no idea that pregnancy was going to be so hard and how it really takes a toll on you physically and emotionally in the first trimester.

I have been taking pictures of my belly since I was 7 weeks. I am already starting to look huge. My clothes don't really fit and I have had to buy some maternity clothes, especially for work. I love reading how the baby develops each week and how big it is getting. I am always tired....like I haven't slept for a week tired and I have no energy. I am always hungry and that is usually when I feel sick to my stomach. Luckily, I haven't had the crazy morning sickness that I hear a lot of women have.

I don't think I have had any crazy food cravings. Mexican food was my favorite food until I got pregnant. Just thinking of the smell and taste makes me want to barf. Also, coffee doesn't appeal to me either. I am not supposed to have caffeine, so it is probably a good thing that it doesn't sound good. Up until the last couple of days, sweets didn't sound good either. When I do have sweets, I have to eat a very small amount or I feel sick. The food that always sounds good is pizza and Chinese and I can't get enough ice water.

Emotionally, I worry about everything...and I mean everything that is or could be going wrong with the baby. I haven't been to the doctor yet, so I have no update on what is going on inside since I got the pregnancy confirmed by a doctor at 6 weeks. My moods were pretty good until I hit 9 weeks. Then I became really moody, grumpy and snappy. I get really irritable and it is hard to calm down. It's worse than PMS, so I often feel overwhelmed with my moods and don't know how to handle it. I also start to get discouraged at how my clothes don't fit. I have to remind myself that I'm pregnant and I'm not getting fat because I'm eating to much, I'm getting fat because there is a baby inside. I also feel like I am not attractive to my husband because I am packing on a belly. When I asked my husband if he thought I was still attractive, he laughed and said the book he is reading said that I would eventually ask that. Of course he said I was attractive in his eyes, but of course he is going to say that to his wife, or he would be in the dog house. :)

I also don't really like talking about the baby. I mentioned this in my last blog, but I guess I still feel the same way. I would rather be a little more private about it. I haven't really told many people, but my husband has told a lot of people. Oh well I guess.

My first appointment is on March 3rd. Finding a doctor was really hard. I wanted to deliver at the hospital that is only ten minutes away from our house, but since that hospital is new, a lot of OB-GYN's don't deliver there and those that do, don't take my insurance. So I am having to settle with a clinic/hospital that is farther from my house in Grapevine..which on a good traffic day only takes about 30 minutes. So not too bad I guess.

I am excited and nervous about the appointment. I will get to hear the heartbeat and see it on the sonogram. Who knows, we might see two babies. Yeah...there is some thoughts (and maybe a bet or two) going around that I am pregnant with twins. This scares me a little, but then again, I did blog about twins last year. Although all the dreams I have had lately has only had one baby. So we will see what happens.

I think with this first appointment is when it will all click and really hit me that I am having a baby. I can't wait until I get to start buying things for the baby. At this point we are holding off until I am more farther along and when we know if it is a boy or a girl. So around May we will starting doing baby registries and all of that good stuff.

Two more weeks and I will be in my second trimester. I am looking forward to it as I am told that it is the easiest out of the three trimesters. I wouldn't mind having more energy and not feeling so tired. I got a lot of stuff to do before September, so I need all of the energy I can get.

7 Weeks

8 Weeks

9 Weeks

10 Weeks

11 Weeks

We're Pregnant

For the last couple of years my husband and I have talked about starting a family. After all, we have almost been married for 8 years and society expects couples that have been married for at least a year to have kids. In my experience, society thinks your weird if you have been married for a long period of time and you don't have kids and the looks and comments that are given back to you when you say your waiting are really annoying to say the least. But, I don't have to worry about that now because as of New Years Eve, I found out I'm pregnant (OMGosh, everyone freak out)...

So like I said, my hubby and I have been talking about starting a family since we moved to Texas. I have been reading books about ovulation, charting your body temperature, and how to get pregnant, which in high school health classes, it seemed really easy, but in reality, it's not. So I feel like I was pretty knowledgeable on how to get knocked up, which by the way, Naturally Knocked Up by Donielle Baker is a really good book. The only thing was stopping us from getting pregnant was our vacation in December 2013. You can't travel on a cruise ship when your in your third trimester and you can't bring a baby on board, so we had to wait a while until I was in the clear.

December came and we thought we would try and see what happens. We prayed about it, so I wasn't going to get too worked up if I didn't get pregnant because I know God has a plan. About a week after, I felt a little out of sync, of course I had wondered, but it was way to early to tell. It wasn't until the cruise is when I was starting to suspect that maybe I was. I was really tired, moody, and just not feeling the best. I figured it was because we were busy doing a lot of activities on the cruise and at ports that it made me tired and hungry all the time.

When I came back from the cruise, I still didn't feel very good and I was late. I put off buying a pregnancy test because those are not cheap, but on New Years Eve I decided to go get one and though that it would be a cool way to enter the new year if I was pregnant. Well, the test instantly turned positive. I mumbled "what the heck" to myself and I looked at it for a while. I read the instructions over and over to see if I was really reading the test correctly. I called my hubby into the bathroom and told him to look at it and see what it says. In a calm voice, he said "its positive" and then he said "cool." What?!?! It sounded like he had his act together. I on the other hand was literally scratching my head and in shock. So, I took another test about thirty minutes later. Again, positive. By this time, my husband had already blabbed the news. The next day I took another test, again it was positive and a few days after that, I took another test. 4 tests both were positive. So I guess I really was pregnant, even though I still didn't believe it.

On January 6th, we decided to go to a doctor to get it confirmed. I was overwhelmed at the clinic. I guess it was because I was nervous or excited, but either way, I couldn't get it together. I had some blood tests done to see how far along I was and to see if things were good. Turns out at that time I was 6 weeks pregnant and the blood work came back fine.

I am now 8.5 weeks pregnant. It has been hard so far. The first week of January I was always crashing because I had low blood sugar. I had to eat like every hour and even though I ate, I still felt hungry. Luckily I seemed to get that under control within a week, even though I have to eat all the time, but at least I do not get sick to my stomach as much as I was getting. I also got this massive migraine, which was not fun either. Last week I struggled with fatigue. Like going to bed at 6:00 p.m. was ideal, especially when I don't sleep well at night. For the last month I wake up at least 2 times because of crazy dreams and/or I have to use the restroom. There are many times I can't get back to sleep, so I am running on like 4-5 hours of sleep. I'm also constantly thirty and I have been craving soup and Papa Murphy's. I haven't had caffeine since January 1st. That is crazy to me since I love coffee and used to drink it every day, but the thought of coffee makes me want to puke. That is sad because on our cruise, we bought coffee from Belize, Costa Maya and Honduras and I can't even try it. Well, technically I can. I can have 200 mg of coffee a day, but I am trying to be good and healthy. Finding something to wear has been a struggle too. Things are already getting snug, so I only have like 2 outfits that "fit," plus my pajamas and sweats.

I also notice that people get on my nerves, especially when it comes to the baby. Like I literally found out that I'm pregnant and people are asking me all of these questions and want to know who's going to be at the hospital when I'm in labor and who is going to come visit me, etc. Hold on people, calm down! These are all question that should be asked in the third trimester or something. Also, people who normally don't talk to me all of a sudden want to be in my life and of course give me their "advice."Maybe it's because I am not ready to talk about the baby. Yes, I am aware that I am pregnant, but at this point, anything can happen and I don't want to make all of these plans and then find out I lost the baby or something. I can thank my girlfriends for this because everyone I know has had a miscarriage, so I fear that it will happen to me too. I never used to have this fear until lately when I have met many women who have gone through this.

Also, I think I will get more excited when I see the doctor for the first time and hear the heart beat and see the sonogram. Unfortunately, I have to wait until March to see the doctor because with all of the job changes, I don't have insurance. Yes, I can pay cash, but in all reality, they can't get me in for 2-3 weeks, which will almost be March, so why not wait a couple more weeks and save some money. At that time I will be 14 weeks, so I hope that I can stay healthy and everything will be okay by then. Again, another worry I have. The funny thing is that the voice inside me says that everything will be okay.

 I got approximately 231 days to go. My due date is September 4th (my sisters birthday), but I want to have the baby on September 1st aka Labor day. Think about it, I will be in labor on Labor day...yeah, I'm cheesy that way, but we will see what happens.

I look forward to reaching week 9, well, I'm really excited to be out of this trimester. I hear the second trimester is easier and I like the sound of that. :)

Crusing 2013

I need a vacation from our vacation we just took! Our Christmas cruise was fun and memorable. The day before the cruise, we flew into New Orleans, Louisiana. It was my first time there. We met my parents and my sister at the airport, got our hotel and then went to Bourbon Street. I was not impressed. There were three things to see: souvenir shops, bars/restaurants and strip clubs. I felt like I was at a big college party because there was mostly college age people walking around drunk and acting like idiots. That's not really my thing and there was too much stimulation that I was overwhelmed. Also, New Orleans looks ghetto, so I wasn't impressed with the city either, although I am sure there are nicer areas that I didn't see.

On Sunday, it was finally the time to get on the ship. It was cold and rainy. We just explored the ship, ate food and hung out until it was time to sail away. We had to sail through the Mississippi River for about 9 hours (I believe) until we actually got to the ocean. The next day was a full day at sea. It was cloudy, rainy and cool. We went to a couple of events on the ship and continued to explore what the ship had to offer. Towards the afternoon, sun was starting to peak out and it was getting warmer, which was a good sign. That night we went to a musical show and hung around.

The next day we docked in Cozumel, Mexico. It was nice and warm. We decided it would be a day for shopping, although our first stop was Starbucks. :) Shopping in Cozumel was interesting to say the least. For anyone who hasn't been out of the country or to Cozumel, the employees stand by the entrance of their story and practically and (sometimes literally) grab you in the store, especially the jewelry stores. I guess my mom was an easy target as the employees would always grab her into the stores. At least we got a bunch of free earnings and charms because we went in! Later that day we ate lunch at Jimmy Buffets Margaritaville. My hamburger was $116 (Pesos) it was expensive (about $16 US dollars). By that time we were ready to head back to the ship. Erin and I went to  go lay by the pool, but it started raining. So we went back to her room and took a nap while the others hung out. Our ship sailed away to head to our next port. That night we learned a dance (I can't remember what its called), went to a magic show and played shuffle board.


The next day was Christmas and we were in Belize. Our ship couldn't dock at the pier, so we had to tender (be taken to shore on a smaller boat) about 5 miles. That day we decided to go cave tubing and zip-lining. We had to go on a big tour bus and drive 1.5 hours to the jungle. Our tour guide gave us a lot of information about Belize and what to expect on our adventure.We did cave tubing first. The caves we were in were historical Mayan caves where they did a lot of their bloodshed and other traditions. It was obviously dark in the caves, but we had lights on top of our helmets. Because there were so many other people tubing at the same time, it was really lit up and you can see pretty well. After the tubing, we dried off and went zip-lining. By then we were starving and was time to eat Belizean food, which consisted of chicken, rice and beans. It was so good. After this, it was time to head back to the pier. Our tour was running a little bit late, so we had to rush to the boat so we could be transported back to the ship. As we approached the ship, they were already pulling up the anchor, so we made it just in time. That night we celebrated Christmas and hung out since we were exhausted from the day.

Wednesday, we were in Roatan, Honduras. This place was beautiful. This was the day we wanted to go to the beach. Getting to the beach was a little interesting, but we made it. The water was so warm. This is where I spent most of my time since I love swimming. Others laid on the beach soaking up the sun and drinking coconut water out of a coconut. We were there a couple of hours and then decided to go back to the pier to do some shopping. It was a cute little place to shop and because we were the only ship there, it wasn't too crowed either. That night on the ship we saw a comedy show and sat on the top deck and looked at the stars.

Costa Maya was our last port. We decided to just explore the area. We rented a golf cart and cruised down the streets to the beach. They had some nice beaches and they had shells!  We also got some chips and salsa and some Mexican Coke (which is the best kind). When we had to return the golf cart, they were trying to hustle my dad saying we didn't pay (which we did and we had the receipt to prove it). That was a little nerve wracking, but my dad didn't give in and we quickly walked away. After that we did a little shopping before heading back to the ship. That night on the ship, we decided to dress up and get our pictures taken and go to a steakhouse for dinner. After that, we saw a circus soleil show. It was neat.

The last full day was at sea. It was my hardest day because I felt sea sick and was really tired. Plus it was cloudy and rainy again. Most people just hung out, but I took a nap and didn't do much. I can't remember what we did that night, I guess its because we were all pretty tired at this point. :)

The last day we had to wake up early so we could get transferred to the airport. The New Orleans airport sucks. My family had to check in at a different part of the airport. We just decided to met up after we went through security because at most airports, that is what you can do. Not at this airport!!! We were stuck in this small terminal with hardly anything to eat or do. So needless to say, we didn't even get to say goodbye to my parents and sister. I need closure, which I didn't get, so that really threw me off. I got over it, but still, I wasn't happy that the airport wouldn't allow people to walk around the airport.

It felt weird to be back and it made me appreciate what we have. When we were at our ports, we saw the reality of those who actually live there. We saw a lot of poor neighborhoods aka slums and people begging for your money or business. We even saw animals that were skin and bones. It was sad to see and it made you feel guilty as you know that you have plenty to eat on the ship, a warm place to sleep and money in your pocket. Also, there was garbage everywhere, even in the ocean and on the beaches. I can see how dolphins and sea life can die because of being caught up in garbage. I definitely see a need for these places and how these people need help. It makes me want to go on a missions trip one day and help out.

Well that pretty much sums up the trip. I can't wait to plan the next one. :)

New Years Resolution

New Years Resolutions....we all make them and most of the time we fail on majority of them. I have learned over the years to think realistic and small. For 2013, my goal was to get exercising again. I used to work out all the time. I loved to work out. My favorite form of exercise was running, especially around the University of Oregon campus and running on the trails of running legend, Steve Prefontaine. Of course, around that time, I was young and carefree and didn't have a lot of responsibility. Then, I met a man and I got married. Not only was I a full time wife, I was also a full time college student and I worked full time. When you are busy, you don't really have time for yourself. I stopped working out and often times resulted to fast food because when you start your day at 6am and your last class ends at 10pm, the last thing you want to do is go home and cook dinner. Its easier to go get something fast, so you can go home and finish any chores that needs to be done or homework that needs to be submitted in hopes to go to bed at a "reasonable" time, which normally was between 1am-2am. On average, I got 4-5 hours of sleep every night. Up until we moved to Texas in 2012, this was how i lived  life for five years.

I obviously didn't take care of myself during this time of my life and I was also miserable too. I  struggled at life and was unhappy...and exhausted. There were even a few times I landed in the emergency room because of fatigue and stress. I have learned that I hold my stress on the right side of my torso. I often mistake the pain as a kidney or bladder infection, gallstones or a appendicitis. These are expensive mistakes and its no fun having pain due to stress.

Since I have been married, I have gained 50 pounds.I can't even wear my wedding ring anymore. Going clothes shopping isn't fun either, because nothing fits. When I sit back and think about the last 8 years, I can't believe how I let myself go. Especially when I was an advocate for excercising and being  healthy.

For 2013, my goal was to get moving again. I started out going to the gym before work. I was pretty successful getting up super early in the morning and working out, but I got bored and I didn't have anything to hold me accountable. I needed something more intense, like Crossfit or something. In May, John encouraged me to do taekwondo with him. He told me I would get a good workout. So of course, I tried it and have been doing it since May 13th (our wedding anniversary). I do get a great workout every time and I have noticed results. So I feel like I can say I was successful with meeting my goal for 2013!!

Although I have rocked the goal of exercise, I still struggle in other areas of my life. This year I have been struggling with a lot of anxiety attacks. I also feel like I am drowning in the ocean of life. This last year has been super stressful for me. I started a new job, which at first I liked, but learned real quick (within a month of employment), the company and job was not for me. I do not have a healthy work environment and my morals and values are higher than the mission of those I work for. I have been actively job searching, but obviously God is not done with me yet.

Graduate school was another thing that stressed me out. Before moving to Texas, I was pretty much finished with grad school, except for the last requirement, which was the thesis project. For the last year, I struggled to stay motivated and complete a project that was super challenging. Thankfully, I finished grad school last week and now I can finally get rid of something that was one of the hardest things I've ever done. But I am proud I accomplished something so big, and I am the first one in my family to get a master's degree.

My goal for 2014 is to get back on track with eating. A few years ago I found out that I had a food allergy to dairy and I am not supposed to have sugar. Since I found out about my food allergies, I have learned a lot about how dairy isn't really good for anyone and also what food can do to your body if you are allergic to food. It is hard to give up dairy. It is practically in everything. But the more I eat it, the worse it makes me feel and look. Sugar also makes me feel sick as well. So if I want to loose weight and feel great, I need to ditch the dairy and sugar. I also want to decrease gluten as well. I do not eat a lot of gluten to begin with, but when I have food with gluten in it, it makes me feel yucky too. So I guess clean eating and eating healthy foods is the way to go. This is not a diet, its a life style. A lifestyle that will take some time to get used to, but it is important for me so I do not continue to feel sick. 

Another goal for 2014 is to be more substainable. This sounds really Oregon of me, but I want to recycle more and use less waste. Texas isn't as big on recycling like the West Coast is, so I have slacked a little on recycling because its more of a challenge here. I also want my home to be less toxic. So using more natural cleaners would be ideal, as well at ditching my old candles and getting candles with soy or beeswax wics since they burn cleaner. I also want to make a compost so I can plant healthy herbs and plants. 

So that is basically it. I am excited to see what 2014 brings and how my life will change next  year. I wish you luck on your New Years resolutions! 

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